Tag Archive | feelings

I’ll Get You My Pretty! Not. Kindness Challenge, Week 2

selfCompassionGrim, that is how the Kindness Challenge’s self-compassion week felt! Self-love week was joyous while unloved and unseen parts bathed themselves in self-love, enjoying the warmth and healing. But self-compassion the sacred act of suffering with the suffering parts of myself; totally sucked!

To support and encourage the suffering parts, I required a “face” of self-compassion. A familiar icon that personifies hope so my barely mobile suffering parts have a guru to crawl toward, to look at, to connect to self-compassion’s healing powers.

Having faith that an idea would emerge, I returned to my daily tasks. With a few twists of her magic wand somewhere from my subconscious she created an opening and emerged. It was the famous Dorothy’s compassionate and guiding force along the Yellow Brick Road en route to the Wizard of Oz. Glinda the Good Witch.glindaselfcompassion

Glinda was the perfect self-compassion guru! She was present, loving, peaceful, and wise. She gently shared wisdom while radiating confidence in Dorothy’s innate intelligence to untangle her disorientation. I hired Glinda! She was now the face of my self-compassion.

With Glinda The Good Witch on board, I bravely confronted my wicked witch part that criticized me bitterly, judgmentally, and was rage filled. The infinite criticism stopped me in my tracks because I believed my wicked witch! This critical wicked witch filled my stomach with pain and body with paralysis.

Glinda The Good Witch of my self-compassion ascended wearing her ball gown, twisting her magic wand while her tiara sparkled. I felt an encouraging shift as Glinda and my self-compassion arrived. The paralysis was melting. The wicked witch of criticism was so righteous and self-centered she didn’t see self-compassion also known as Glinda silently emerging.

Once my mind’s eye glimpsed Glinda surfacing in the periphery, I internally shifted my attention toward her. The simple act of placing my attention on Glinda slowly diminished the wicked witch’s voice and rage filled energy. Glinda’s compassionate energy took root within me. I sensed my task was to remain focused on Glinda’s compassion. This simple act of sliding my attention away from my critical wicked witch would cause her nasty effects to fade. Glinda stood by my side until my complete attention was transferred from self-criticism to self-compassion.

With my face turned toward Glinda, she gently placed her guiding hand on my chin and another on my cheek. She asked me to mentally review my entire day not only a slice of it. To support my imaginary walk thru my day, with reverence and care, she slowly turned my head from the left to the right. I could see the ruins of darkness and anger at my left which was the damage caused by the critical inner wicked witch. The day’s landscape transformed as my head was guided right. There was brightness, a sense of peacefulness, a quiet rhythmic productive feeling, and a necessary sense of relaxation as well.

My self-compassion guru was showing me that my day contained a variety of feelings, mishaps, and accomplishments. This guided tour, made me realize that my inner wicked witch arrives via her broomstick to criticize me when I am hyper focused on a real or imagined unsuccessful event.  Inviting her to stay and listening to my wicked witch’s negative claims is like drinking a potion that shifts my perception away from the rightful day’s events and experiences and turns them into the critical wicked witch’s truth.

When I access, welcome, and live the energy of self-compassion, my critical inner wicked witch melts just like in the Wizard of Oz movie. Her power is stripped in the face of caring and wise self-compassion.

As I ingest this astounding realization of the power of self-compassion, I can hear Glinda say to me as she said to Dorothy…

“You’ve always had the power my dear, you just had to learn it for yourself. “

 

 

All You Need is Love, Sweet Love-Kindness Challenge Week 1

KindnessWeek1 SelfloveMy Week 1 Kindness Challenge of Self-love had a theme song. Lionel Richie and his Commodores have randomly and quietly been singing lines of Sweet Love to me over and over and over. I inwardly smile each time this mellow song finds its way into my head. It was comforting, supportive guidance. Let me acquaint you with a few lines from this week’s theme song:

 

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh Sweet love (Sweet love, well)

I know you’re searchin’

I know you’re searchin’ for a little love

The Commodores were correct, I was searching. Searching for my definition of self-love by starting with questions.   What is self-love?   What actions are self-loving?   When am I feeling self-love but don’t embrace it?   What is the difference between self-loving and self-centered?   When I am self-loving what does my life look like and feel like?   Does my life improve if I live from and with self-love?  Or does my life not improve but instead naturally align to my spiritual truth?

These questions revealed my truth of self-love. During the week, I experienced self-love as a healing balm, guiding wisdom, and a bunch of good feelings! Each morning, I gently reminded myself to feel self-love. I took a moment to imagine an inner emotional landscape being bathed in self-love.  Of course, it felt enjoyable, but it was so much more than that.

It created a world where unhealed emotions, like depression, fear, and hurt came to soothe themselves. The wounds and traumas that birthed these feelings felt safe, loved, and cared for enough to heal. They were called to the self-loving energy and instinctively opened to heal naturally.

This healing experience had the human sensation of the welcoming effects of the first warm summer-like day. When you feel pulled by the sunlight and warm air to drink it all in by taking a walk or sitting outside. It’s a feeling of refreshment, peace, and relaxation. This is how my unhealed feelings felt in the presence of self-love.

I need to go further with this…my repressed parts, or at least some of them, awakened. I felt unnamed hurts that were always carried with me, loosen up and bathe themselves in the presence of self-love.

My energy of self-love wasn’t only healing the suffering it was guiding me toward activities that were self-loving instead of activities that were distracting or mere habits. When I allowed my attention to follow this feeling of self-love it was like it was waving flags to focus my attention toward the self-loving choice. Each choice was an island and self-love confidently, happily, and purposefully waved her flag, next to the most self-loving choice.

I followed self-loves accurate lead. I needed relaxation and soothing by watching Blue Bloods. This family police drama allows me to spend time with a tight-knit family that supports, connects, and cares for each other. Their struggle and insistence on doing what is good heals and acknowledges a part of me.

Thru this relaxing moment with Blue Bloods, I sensed a very young child part that was ready for healing. This young conscientious part must accomplish grown up tasks that she isn’t developmentally equipped to comprehend. Being a pleaser, she insecurely attempts them while searching the adult faces for validation. The adults don’t fill her needs. This innocent moment in time sets the stage for a lifelong unconscious feeling. An unhealthy sensation of anchoring her little feet and stretching herself to live life years ahead of her emotional development. This adult pleasing part always feels emotionally unbalanced and insecure.

This week the young, stretched thin, insecure part of me was raised to consciousness and acknowledged. The energy of self-love pumped a healing balm thru me thanks to the requests of this week’s Kindness Challenge. While this part isn’t freed from the unbalanced and insecure feelings, yet, it is enjoying being seen and out of subconscious hiding. I can only assume that self-love’s energy will fully heal it.

The Commodores, singing this soothing and healing song of Sweet Love to me this week, offered self-love’s silent healing powers a sound and vibration. I guess the Commodores share the wisdom of the human soul and the Beatles….it turns out, it’s true…All You Need is Love!

Kindness Challenge

kindnessIt’s time for the Kindness Challenge! A seven-week exploration of the act of being friendly, generous, and considerate to others as well as myself. Niki from The Richness of the Simple Life, is our leader as a group of bloggers delve into and play with kindness.

 My heart and soul feels full and joyful as my eyes ingest the challenge’s wishes. My humanness accepts that my heart and soul has heaps of knowledge to express. I’m already hearing my heart and soul say that is why you are on earth…to be kind and to live your human experience from the continual guidance of kindness.

 My human self is eager to feel life with kindness running the show…

 Let the journey begin!