Tag Archive | spiritualgrowth

How Self-Love Shepherds – Kindness Challenge Week 1

self-love shepherdsSelf-Love was the topic for Week 1 of the Kindness Challenge! In my post, All You Need is Love, Sweet Love, Lionel Richie and the Commodores’ song named Sweet Love was on repeat in my head while writing my surprising and healing self-love experience.

While reviewing my notes I discovered an extra piece of essential self-love knowledge. I realized self-love is the act of sincerely listening to my personal truth; all of IT, the good, the bad, and the ugly. Respectfully listening loosens and frees the bad, accepts the ugly, and salutes the good.

This sometimes brutal, sometimes reassuring honesty reflexively aligns me with the truth of my soul. Self-love means loving my peace filled soul messages as much as loving my unhealed battered, broken parts. The self-loving causes a deliberate, meaningful, feeling of alignment. From my mind’s eye, I can almost see a golden, flexible protective cord that gently shepherds all my tender and true pieces.

The good, bad, and ugly pieces exist no matter how I treat myself but the shepherding action of self-love comforts, contains, and direct the parts toward wholeness. When I criticize, dismiss, or judge these same parts the golden safety cord isn’t activated and the parts become fragmented, hardened and dangerous like shards of glass.

The negative energy directed toward the parts causes me to feel disconnected and so I am. Until I remember to welcome self-love once again…

 

All You Need is Love, Sweet Love-Kindness Challenge Week 1

KindnessWeek1 SelfloveMy Week 1 Kindness Challenge of Self-love had a theme song. Lionel Richie and his Commodores have randomly and quietly been singing lines of Sweet Love to me over and over and over. I inwardly smile each time this mellow song finds its way into my head. It was comforting, supportive guidance. Let me acquaint you with a few lines from this week’s theme song:

 

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh Sweet love (Sweet love, well)

I know you’re searchin’

I know you’re searchin’ for a little love

The Commodores were correct, I was searching. Searching for my definition of self-love by starting with questions.   What is self-love?   What actions are self-loving?   When am I feeling self-love but don’t embrace it?   What is the difference between self-loving and self-centered?   When I am self-loving what does my life look like and feel like?   Does my life improve if I live from and with self-love?  Or does my life not improve but instead naturally align to my spiritual truth?

These questions revealed my truth of self-love. During the week, I experienced self-love as a healing balm, guiding wisdom, and a bunch of good feelings! Each morning, I gently reminded myself to feel self-love. I took a moment to imagine an inner emotional landscape being bathed in self-love.  Of course, it felt enjoyable, but it was so much more than that.

It created a world where unhealed emotions, like depression, fear, and hurt came to soothe themselves. The wounds and traumas that birthed these feelings felt safe, loved, and cared for enough to heal. They were called to the self-loving energy and instinctively opened to heal naturally.

This healing experience had the human sensation of the welcoming effects of the first warm summer-like day. When you feel pulled by the sunlight and warm air to drink it all in by taking a walk or sitting outside. It’s a feeling of refreshment, peace, and relaxation. This is how my unhealed feelings felt in the presence of self-love.

I need to go further with this…my repressed parts, or at least some of them, awakened. I felt unnamed hurts that were always carried with me, loosen up and bathe themselves in the presence of self-love.

My energy of self-love wasn’t only healing the suffering it was guiding me toward activities that were self-loving instead of activities that were distracting or mere habits. When I allowed my attention to follow this feeling of self-love it was like it was waving flags to focus my attention toward the self-loving choice. Each choice was an island and self-love confidently, happily, and purposefully waved her flag, next to the most self-loving choice.

I followed self-loves accurate lead. I needed relaxation and soothing by watching Blue Bloods. This family police drama allows me to spend time with a tight-knit family that supports, connects, and cares for each other. Their struggle and insistence on doing what is good heals and acknowledges a part of me.

Thru this relaxing moment with Blue Bloods, I sensed a very young child part that was ready for healing. This young conscientious part must accomplish grown up tasks that she isn’t developmentally equipped to comprehend. Being a pleaser, she insecurely attempts them while searching the adult faces for validation. The adults don’t fill her needs. This innocent moment in time sets the stage for a lifelong unconscious feeling. An unhealthy sensation of anchoring her little feet and stretching herself to live life years ahead of her emotional development. This adult pleasing part always feels emotionally unbalanced and insecure.

This week the young, stretched thin, insecure part of me was raised to consciousness and acknowledged. The energy of self-love pumped a healing balm thru me thanks to the requests of this week’s Kindness Challenge. While this part isn’t freed from the unbalanced and insecure feelings, yet, it is enjoying being seen and out of subconscious hiding. I can only assume that self-love’s energy will fully heal it.

The Commodores, singing this soothing and healing song of Sweet Love to me this week, offered self-love’s silent healing powers a sound and vibration. I guess the Commodores share the wisdom of the human soul and the Beatles….it turns out, it’s true…All You Need is Love!

6 Out of 30 Ways to Celebrate Success

fantasywire“I just feel really good about my accomplishments. I haven’t had, like, a party because a deal goes through or something like that. I don’t know. I need to develop that – I need to have something that I do when things go right.”, said Curtis Jackson aka 50 Cent. I don’t know if he followed his advice but I’m gonna follow it.

In my post 30 Ways to Celebrate Success, I set the stage to honor my blog’s growth. My original plan was to skip the honoring thing and create another to do list. But then I had an intuitive flash of a glowing orange and yellow egg shape. It was nestled beneath a grey geometric structure. While my human self felt enthusiastic about creating a brand new to do list. My soul, via the image, was politely requesting that I honor this leg of the blogging journey.

Knowing my soul’s messages expand and heal me I listened to my soul’s wisdom and applied 50 Cents advice. THE Google supplied me with the article 30 Ways to Celebrate Success. And I got busy celebrating! I grouped a bunch of similar ideas to start with. I planned to:

2.Share the news with family, friends, and colleagues

7.Thank everyone who supported you

8.Tweet about it

9.Accept and Enjoy the compliments

21.Write your (my) success story to share in a newsletter to colleagues, clients

22. Write a Blog Post about it

Sharing the news with people who have supported me and thanking them, was a somewhat easy step. It felt right, after a few quick pulses of fear that said, “They don’t care, they don’t want to hear your bragging.” Taking in a deep breath, I asked myself if fear was correct. Immediately, an authentic, caring part of myself emerged to remind me that they want you to succeed, to be happy, and to enjoy yourself in this process. They would feel joyful and happy to hear about your accomplishments. They are on your side…this is how people act when they are on your side. Of course, my caring self was accurate. I was supported with congratulations and woot woots!

I must admit that, I still haven’t fully digested #9 – their compliments. I do sense that this is a necessary act in honoring. Maybe… next week…. I’ll fully digest their compliment…It’s a lot of love all at once. 😉

On to the surprising effect of writing about my success (#27 & #21). A part of myself felt ashamed to write my story of success. My shame felt fearful of being humiliated and therefor unsafe. Shame wonders…what will happen to me as I open to honoring. Truth be told, this part of me is new to the limelight. And maybe it’s just too much attention.

As I dig a little deeper, I unexpectedly realize this shy, ashamed part wonders how this change will effect her life. My shame realizes this honoring is acknowledging the new skills and growth. This shy-shame part also feels a bit sad and somewhat nostalgic. This part of me reminds me when I asked my niece what she thinks she will be like when she turns 5. She very sweetly and sadly said, “I’ll miss 4.” The sad, shame, and shy parts are tangled together as they feel the growth happening. I assure them they can let go and growing will be okay albeit; foreign and bumpy.

As my shy-ashamed-sad self adjusts by growing into accomplishment’s shine and success simultaneously another part of me feels honored. respected from being acknowledged. It feels revered. This honored part has been confidently waiting for me to arrive at this level of growth. It was always expecting me, having no doubt that I would make this stop on my journey. This reverence is so profound. I must serve it by completing #8 …Tweet About It.

And so, I did!

 

Photo credits –  FantasyWire

 

Intuition 101: Connection

An indepth blog post on intuition… on how to get connected and how to stay connected. I didn’t want to lose this post so I decided keeping it close to me on my blog would be the solution.

EssenCentral

Intuition is often a spontaneous thing. It floats in randomly and before you know it, it’s gone again.

What if I told you it doesn’t have to be a random occurrence?

The thing is, our intuition, like any other muscle, can be exercised and strengthened. It is absolutely possible to be connected to our intuition in each and every moment, provided we are willing to embrace the gift of this inherent inner wisdom. We don’t have to wait until adversity hits or a big decision is to be made. We have the ability to live fully from this place of intuitive knowledge each day, allowing our inner GPS to guide us throughout the day’s events – from choosing what to eat, what to wear, who to spend time with, what kind of music to listen to, and how best to take care of ourselves that day. We can be fully and…

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Job Gone! Destiny Restores!

Job Gone! Destiny Restores!In my post, Destiny Knocks, I told a magical story about the intuitive experience of a job that was “calling or speaking” to me. While this was my first experience with “speaking” jobs, it wasn’t my last!

I was contemplating returning to a field where I spent 10 years of my life. To reintroduce myself to this field I believed having an opportunity to work short term would answer all my questions and reveal a resolution. While searching the internet to find the perfect opportunity, a job appeared that I sensed was mine.

Because the intuitive sensation scared me, I dismissed the illogical information and applied for other jobs. Told myself I would apply for this job tomorrow. On the next day, when I returned to the job search site, the job was gone. I felt mad at myself for being such a scaredy cat and ignoring my intuitive information. I mean why was I making such a big deal over it! What was so scary! But there was nothing I could do about it now. The job was gone!

The next day, it returned. HHHmmmmm, what was happening…

Since I was given a second chance, I wasn’t about to pass it up. I forwarded the paperwork to the appropriate person. Was only partly surprised when I received the call for the interview. I’m sure you (the reader) knows that I did receive this job. At the end of the conversation, I was told that the job was filled but as it turned out the new hire didn’t have the correct license so they needed to repost the position. So very interesting…isn’t it?.

I do wonder if the job was always mine. Did I lose the opportunity when I energetically disengaged because I feared my intuition? Did the job become available once again when I reengaged with the job?

There is a saying from Dante Alighieri’s, Inferno, “Do not be afraid; our fate cannot be taken from us; it is a gift”. Or maybe Alighieri is correct. This job was my gift. It could never have been taken from me. But still, I wonder…

Ashes to Ashes: The Road Trip

iphone road tripMy mother was cremated after her death. To celebrate her life, I planned a day of traveling to the major places in her life to disperse her ashes. The day of the big event was what would have been her 80th birthday. For nourishment during our daylong celebration, I packed a basket full of snacks. Plus, a birthday cake and champagne to have at the last stop; a restaurant that always brought out my mother’s happiness.

The first stop was a nearby island where my mother spent a few summers at camp as a young child, while my grandmother worked. The camp is long gone but the island remains. I wasn’t sure how it would feel to dip a Dixie cup into the bag of ashes, stroll around the dunes to find a quiet place, think of something meaningful to say, and leave her ashes.  But once we got started, I realized it felt okay to release her ashes. It actually felt fun. She was being honored and released to her next destination at the same time.

Our next stops were 40 minutes southwest. We sprinkled a cup of her ashes in the hedges at her high school, another cup along the sidewalk of her childhood home, and needed to dodge the current residents of the neighborhood where my brother and I grew up. While meandering from town to town, we told stories, discussed the changes to her childhood home, and joyfully relived the memories that took place in these homes. We laughed as we discussed our strategies to release the ashes without getting caught. At each stop, my uncle took pictures. Later creating humorous captions and emailing us each a well-chronicled digital memory book.

After a few hours of driving, reminiscing, and ash tossing, we returned to the seashore; my mother’s favorite place. The first seaside stop was an unkempt beach strip hubbub where my mother spent summers with her sisters as young teenagers. The beach crowd was in full swing and so were we. No longer feeling cautious about our mission to release her ashes at all her favorite spots, we confidently walked onto the beach, identified our spots, and released the ashes. Even though there was a large late afternoon beach crowd sunning on the sand. No one even noticed!

After strolling the strip to locate the restaurant my mother worked at as a teenager, we returned to the car. Driving a few miles south, we arrived at our destination. A high school friend agreed to allow us to park and toss ashes at her beach front cottage; another beach that my mother spent a lot of time with us, her two children. As serendipity, would have it, my friend was home and generously busted out a bottle of wine to toast my mother after we returned from the beach. My friend’s mother arrived who had a strong and important connection to my father. While sharing the bottle of wine we told my friend and her mom about the hilarious and poignant moments of the day. As a group, we reminisced about life in our childhood town, the events that brought us laughter and trouble, and how we handled the passing on of parents and spouses.

Eventually, the story telling died because our stomachs were rumbling. Now hungry we headed to my mother’s favorite lobster, fried food, and BYOB shack.  After we ate the healthiest meals we could order at a BYOB fried food joint, I lifted the glistening chocolate birthday cake from a basket, rooted the number 80 candle into the frosting, and lit the candle as we sang Happy Birthday to my mother. The large family surrounding us on 5 different tables joined in the singing not realizing they were singing to my dead mother. After my brother, aunt, uncle, and I enjoyed our cake slices, we shared the cake with the “choir”. They happily devoured it. It was likely, a perfect ending to their day of sun, drinking few too many beers, and stuffing themselves with belly full of fried food…. a perfect mix of sweet and salty.

My brother, aunt, and uncle, and I stopped to watch the setting sun behind the restaurant. That we were ending our day while the sun set seemed symbolic and a bit of a nod from my mother. A very satisfying day indeed!

My mother’s encouragement didn’t end with the sunset. The next morning during my daily coffee run, I heard the song. The one that started as a joke in my post Stairway to Heaven. While adding milk to my coffee, I heard Bob Dylan singing Knocking on Heaven’s Door….now, my mother’s way of communicating from heaven.

 

Plane Ticket Turbulence

airplane ticket turbulanceThe plane tickets…. first, I had them…. then I didn’t, but ultimately, I did! This post is a short one about sharing my spirit’s message with my at-the-time boyfriend. As part of planning to visit him I bought plane tickets through a broker because they were less expensive. The broker had bogus excuses about mailing the tickets I purchased. Obviously, being concerned I told my at-the-time boyfriend about the problem. Concluding our conversation with…. “but I feel like I’ll get them.”

My brain or maybe my ego couldn’t make sense of my spirit’s message. There was no reason for me to believe this plane ticket problem would be fine. But some part of me already knew the outcome and told me about it. I spent a considerable amount of time making calls, staying on the line, and yelling at the person on the other end who had lots of excuses that others must have fallen for. I was relentless!

It did end as my spirit predicted. I received the tickets even though everything about the broker seemed shady and a positive result unlikely. Decades later, I’m still curious about this event. Was the intuitive message sent to motivate me to act, to not feel hopeless or would I have received the tickets no matter how I approached this situation? I still wonder…

Have you had an intuitive experience that proved correct whether you listened to or not? PLEASE, share.